Shaking hands with the man in the moon

Night time, bed time. I find myself actually ready and almost able to fall asleep soon. I have a big day tomorrow. 8 am I go in for my lab test. then I am driving someone to work. Can't decide when I will do my shot. I'm thinking I will come home and mow the lawn, then eat something then do my shot. Then it will be late enough in the day that It won't affect my night too poorly. I will still get sick, but the onset of the medication going into my system is so slow that I have abut 6-8 hours before I start to get a little sick, then After the meeting I will be sick. Then I can come home and sleep. But all that is just a little plan. I still am not sure how bad the effects of the meds will be on me so I need to really take it one day at a time.

So tonight, I rest, I sleep.
I fall into my dreams.

4:30pm (my early morning)

I am arising to the beauty of the day. I've talked about pacing myself when doing activities and the same goes for resting and sleeping. I really needed that sleep. It didn't take me long to get to bed this time. I've only been awake for a few moments, but i am ready to conquer my evening. I have my thursday A.A. big book that I will be going to. I wonder if me drinking coffee on top of my ribavirin is having a huge effect on me. I cut down some on my caffeine intake. But I will try to just have a cup in the morning(My mornings which are the real worlds afternoons, and then no coffee when I go to a meeting. Isn't that an Oxy-moron, An A.A. meeting without coffee?

Filled with positive attitude right now. Not really anxious about tomorrows shot, but not looking forward to losing this good all around, physical and mental feeling that I am having. Oh well, I will feel good again, probably same time next week. But thats tomorrow, not today, And right now my present is waiting to be opened....

I'm so tired I can't sleep..

Sitting, staring, looking, watching and I'm feeling tired. Each and every minute that goes by-is another that I'm not in bed with closed eyes.

And I am still awake. It is almost 9am. That would be just fine, but I have been up all night. The Ribavirin has done a number on my sleep schedule. I will get to bed shortly, then wake up late, probably too late to do any yard work. I would stay up all day and try to get to bed early tonight, but I don't think it would be a good Idea to go without any sleep at all. I know it is only an extra 13 hours, but i am so brain fogged and out of it as it is. I need to be smart and get some rest so my body can heal itself. I need somewhat of a balance. Even if it is off kiltered and all wacked out like a salvador dali painting.

Someone left me a nice comment to one of my posts. It was from a person from "THE Hepatitis C FORUM" that I talk to. He also is going through what I am going through. That forum has been like my AA/CMA meetings are for my addiction. I go there to inquire,implore,and just listen to what others are going through, and have gone through. It really helps out so much.

Tomorrow I have my lab tests at 8am to do and then after that I will be doing my second "interferon" shot. I take the pills daily, morning and night, and then I take my shot once a week. I do the shot myself. Last week for my first day the nurse was there to guide me through it. I still did it myself, but she was there to help me. I am okay with this. I'd rather not be around needles at all, but I am doing it to save my life, and I value my life these days.

Well I better try again to drift away into my dreams. Wish me luck...