8:50pm

Finally got to sleep. Tired and sleepy but wasn't able to hold down any dreams. Keep waking cause I drank too much water. Feeling nauseous and headache is stronger. I'm going to take some tylenol and force myself to eat something. Maybe a yogurt will be sufficient enough to help my yuckiness. right now I couldn't eat anything more. Then I am off to bed again.

"I'm Done for the day..."

I've done enough today. I just went out and got my sponsor his birthday gift and brought it over to him. He really wants me to show up tonight and make an appearance. I told him I'd see how I was feeling and try, But I won't be able to. I've already used up enough of my energy. This treatment can do a number on your socializing and just plain hanging out. Some of my friends don't seem to understand why I just don't come around sometimes. I'll hear them say, "Oh, why don't you just come for a little bit?" well, I can't even do little things around here sometimes, how do they expect me to go somewhere?

Here is a little knowledge for you to understand how really exhausting this treatment can be. My mom was complaining about something sticky on the floor so I took a towel and held it under the kitchen sink to get it nice and wet. I took my socks off and then I threw the towel on the floor. Then I commence to walk around the kitchen floor using my legs and as strength to scrub the floor with the wet towel. This works really well. But keep in mind I only have a small kitchen and this is all that I did. I might of got down on my knees for a second or two, but thats it. Now I am so completely exhausted and tired. It really felt like I had done some highschools' whole cafeteria floor.

I'm in the middle of making sure I eat something right now. and then I am laying down for a bit.

Pace yourself - Its Not a Race

I'm doing alright. My stomach is a little queasy and my head has the whisper of an oncoming headache, but it's bearable. I have to pee like a race horse because I have been drinking so much water. I took a shower, and now since my skin has become so dry from the medication, I have to lather my whole body with lotion. I have done quite a lot of things this morning. Nothing too important, but I got some cleaning done,laundry hanged and put away, dishes washed and put away, and some more progress on some artwork that I have been working on.

My sponsor is having a birthday party this afternoon at 5pm. I know I will not be able to make that. I am already tired and getting more fatigued by the minute. But since I do have a little bit of energy left in me, I am going to go buy him a present and then stop by his house and wish him a Happy Birthday. Some people would say, "It's the least I could do" but right now, being on this treatment and feeling the way I do, "It's the most I can do."

I have to make sure to pace myself. I have to watch what I do today, so I don't feel so terrible tomorrow. That is one of the funny things about this disease and especially this treatment. I can have all the Gung Ho today, do a lot, and feel great today, but then when tomorrow comes, Because I over did it today, I will be paying for it tomorrow. So one thing at a time, take it easy, and enjoy what I can do and let go of what I want to do but shouldn't do.

5:44am (18 hours of-off and on sleep)

This is a goodmorning. I am feeling fatigue and my body has an all around yucky feeling. But its do-able. I think I am up for a little bit. We will see. I haven't done much, but gone into my livingroom to turn on the T.V. and now post this new message. So we will see how I actually feel when I start to move around. I feel my stomach wake up, I've been eating lots of vegetables and grains. Thats good, because it means I am having somewhat normal bowel movements. My skin is kind of flaky, a side effect of the medication. I've noticed the hair on my body seem to get thinner. Just a little bit. I need to take a shower today, I am feeling really dirty.