11:15pm - still Up - but not awake

I can no longer move through this day. I am going to fall into my sleep. I have gone past what I should Of done for the day. I am losing my thoughts of what is up from down. Too tired to do anymore. My body is shutting down.I have done all there is. I know to watch myself from doing this again. I need to sleep. goodnight.

Fatigue sets in...

Drowning in the tiredness
of restlessness and extreme fatigue
Washing myself in the exhaustion of
breathlessness and loss of consciousness
looking forward to
when the day does end
when I can finally say
goodnight my friend
And taking the hand
of dreams of sleep
and not waking up
until next week.

So I've paced myself, but I haven't realized that its not all about pacing. When you say the word "PACE" you are describing movement and doing something at a slow and steady rate of momentum. But I need to realize that some of my days, "These lovely Treatment Tiring Days" need to consist and be filled with, sometimes, no momentum. I need the rest, and if need be take a nap, close my eyes. It was and is great thinking, positive perseverance. It is an awesome attitude and the attitude that will need to stay in tune with. I will not lose this smile in my soul. But I must sit back and relax. No Momentum sometimes. Progress not perfection. I guess they say you should try to learn somthing new each and every day, I learned today to take a nap and not push myself too far. I still have to go drive and pick up my friend. I am so grateful to know that he said he will be ready when I go down and pick him up. He understands what I am going through, and cares, and completely knows that my day has been long and I need to get back home here to shake hands with my dreams.

Word of the day "Persevere"

This day is long, and hard to get through, but I am. I finally got to the backyard and did some mowing. It was a nice walk and I listened to a funny comedian on my ipod. Humor is so important. I could feel the rush of smiles killing any fatigue I was having, and when I got done I felt accomplishment. I'm very ready for a nap, but I am just going to go on. I am keeping at a steady, "Do A Little of this and that" pace. and making sure I "Do a little nothing" as well. I was beginning to start to have a headache again. I ate something and now its gone away. My skin isn't itching too bad today. My nausea has subsided.

I have a few more things I need to do for today. I can't wait to fall into my sleep. I should be okay as long as I "Pace" myself.

I can do it!!

Delightful are the mornings that you make wonderful. I choose to be alive today. I choose to move on with what I need to do and what I need to get done. I will pace myself, but I will not sit back and let this day go by without a fight.

As for the way my body feels. I feel Like I have had the flu for the last few days, My body has an all around empty feeling of yuckiness. I have a small pain in the lower of my right rib cage that goes away from time to time. Right around where my liver would be. I will talk to the nurse tomorrow about that. I am extremely fatigued from doing small things. I put up a new vent in the ceiling. Just took some screws out, took out the old one and screwed in a new one. My muscles agonized trying to hold up a light weight vent upside down for 30 seconds.I really still can't get over how tiring this treatment can sometimes make me feel. I've also have become pretty pale. I hope my white cells aren't dropping too low.

But i will still persevere. I will go on and choose to have a good day and make the most of what I can of today. Today is beautiful because I choose to make it beautiful. Today will be a great day because I choose to make it a great day.

Today is Hepatis Awareness Day!!. I hope someday they find a vaccine for this disease, and a full 100% cure.They have vaccines for Hep A and Hep B but still nothing for this silent disease. I want more people to become aware of this disease, and hopefully not be so prejudice against us who have this disease. Don't get all grossed out because you find out that I have Hepatitis C. And don't shy away from me like you wouldn't touch me with a 10 foot pole. Please look into and get informed about Hepatits C. Look into and get informed on this treatment I am, as well as many others are enduring. The more we become aware, the more we know what to fight. And what we have to fight is this disease. Lets have no more people die from hepatitis related diseases.